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#59: The ADHD Smarter Parenting Coaching process

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Understanding the ADHD Parenting Coaching process helps parents understand the value they receive from a free 15-minute ADHD Coaching session: https://www.smarterparenting.com/adhd-parenting-podcast/

An ADHD parenting session is all about helping parents find tailored solutions for the behavior challenges their family is facing. Is your family struggling with communication and misunderstandings? Is your family deal with defiance or anger? Is your family grappling with a lack of trust or respect?

No matter what issue you want to fix, a lot can be accomplished in a free 15-minute session.

Once a parent signs-up for a parenting coaching session, they’ll receive a questionnaire about issues they are dealing with. This allows Parenting Coach Siope Kinikini to come up with three to four parenting techniques using the behavioral skills of the Teaching-Family Model.

A Parenting Coaching session is not to shame you or to make you feel hopeless in your ability. It’s just the opposite. Using behavioral skills for families gives parents hope and confidence, they can heal and elevate their family.

Signing-up for a free 15-minute ADHD Parenting Coaching mini-session sessions will be the best thing you do today.

Sign-up for a free 15-minute ADHD Smarter Parenting Coaching mini-session: https://www.smarterparenting.com/adhd-parenting-podcast/

Help the ADHD Smarter Parenting Podcast continue. Donate today! https://www.smarterparenting.com/donate-now/

Episode Transcript

This is episode 59. During this episode, I will be discussing the coaching process, how to sign up for it, how to receive it and what to expect. Let’s begin.

Smarter Parenting welcomes you to our podcast series, The Parenting Coach for ADHD. Here to heal and elevate lives is your Parenting Coach, Siope Kinikini.

Hello, everyone. How is everyone? How are you, my people? I hope everybody’s doing great. I am doing fantastic. Things are going really well here at Smarter Parenting. And over the last couple of weeks, I’ve been able to coach parents online for the free 15-minute coaching session, and so I wanted to go over what actually happens during this process. For those of you who are on the fence on whether or not you want to sign up for a free coaching session or not, I ask you, go ahead. What do you have to lose? It’s 15-minutes, and we can talk about specifics in your family and with your child, and I can provide you with some feedback and input. Let me describe first off how to do it, what you need to do and the process, and guide you along that process so you understand what you’re getting and what you’re going to receive as well as what I can provide, all right.

In order to sign up for a free 15-minute coaching session, you actually have to jump over to the Smarter Parenting website. On the website, you’ll be able to sign up for coaching, a free 15-minute coaching session. And you can see it on the Smarter Parenting website, it’s listed under coaching. You will put in your name, your email address. And once you are signed in there, you will receive a questionnaire. Now, that questionnaire is important because it gives me some information. You’re going to leave your name, your telephone number, your email address, and also some information about what’s going on with your family.

Now, of course, we’re not going to share this information with other people. It’s actually just so we can get the coaching session and make contact with each other. Rest assured that it remains private. Now the information that you provide on what’s happening with your child will be essential because that is where I will read it and come up with some ideas of how we can communicate during the call. Now, you will also sign up for a very specific time. Now, those time periods vary and they get filled pretty fast, so sign up and set up a time for me to call you.

What will happen is once you fill that out, I receive a notification that you have registered and that you have scheduled a time for this 15-minute free coaching session. I will then call you during that coaching session. I usually send you an email beforehand, just remind you that there is a call. And if I call and you do not answer, you will receive a follow-up email also to reschedule or to find a way that we can communicate again.

I will call you and during that time we will discuss the things that you’d placed on that questionnaire, questions and the concerns that you have on the questionnaire. What I have found super helpful is that the more detail I can receive from that, the more prepared I can be in helping you during that 15-minutes. Now, some people think 15-minutes isn’t very long. The reality is, is it’s very long. Depending on the information that I have, we can really get into a lot of things in that 15-minutes and talk about what you can do, specific things that you can do now.

By the end of the call, you should have three or four different things that you can implement and try with your child. I will suggest three or four different solutions or skills that you should try and work with, with your child. After the call is completed, I will send you a follow-up email. And in that email, I will list everything we discussed and links over to whatever skill I am recommending that you try with your child. You can watch those skills and you can begin to implement them on your own.

Now, I always leave at the end of the email, the opportunity for you to follow-up and we can continue coaching and working through some of these issues more long-term if you feel so, if you feel like that’s something that you want to do. But these initial 15-minutes, I mean, you should be getting quite a bit of value for your time, which is three or four different suggestions on things that you can try, including links and resources that will guide you along that process. I don’t want to leave you empty-handed. I want to be sure that you come, we were able to communicate. We can pinpoint, specifically, areas of concern and that I can give you something that you can do immediately, you can do that day. That is the whole intent.

That’s how the coaching session will go. Now it’s up to you whether or not you want to contact me again and we continue this communication or not. But again, this is what you will get when you call in for a 15-minute free coaching session.

Now in Episode 41 of the podcast, I talked about coaching. And it wasn’t actually that long ago, but let me explain to you kind of the process of what to expect during the coaching session. There are five elements that I cover when I am coaching someone, and the five elements help guide us. It’s a roadmap to help you know what questions you should be asking and how you should be adjusting the skills that you are teaching. Those five elements are what, how, when, where, and why. All of those elements begin with questions that start with those words.

And so if a parent calls me and they say, “Okay, my child is having some difficulty in school with friends, with peers,” for example, and they give me the rundown of what’s happening.

The first question I will ask the parent and myself is, “What skill do we need to be teaching this child? What skill in the Teaching-Family Model should we be addressing and teaching so this child can learn to shape their behavior in a better way?” Okay, so what skill?

Then we ask, “How can I teach this? How do I teach it and how do I teach it effectively?”

Then we ask, “Okay, where am I going to teach this? Am I going to teach this in the morning? Where in my schedule, where am I life is this best taught?” We need to usually teach skills when children are calm and resourceful or when they’re able to interact with us in a positive way.

Then we ask, “When do I know my child understands this?” And you’ll know that when they can Role-play it and practice it multiple times, and do it on their own without prompts and it’s integrated into their body language, in their body and their mind.

And then the final one is relationship, which is why? “Why are we doing this?” Obviously, we’re doing all of this in this particular way so we can preserve and create a strong bond and relationship with the child because the relationship itself is going to help with a lot of the behaviors in and of itself. Relationship is a huge piece of the Teaching-Family Model and what we do.

I will be going through those questions. You present to me an issue or a behavior that you’re struggling with and I will immediately be asking, okay, what skill do we need to teach? Okay, how do we teach this? How should we be teaching this? Then where am I going to teach this in our life? When is the best time to teach it, as where? And then when will I know that they understand this, and this is obviously through Role-play and they’re able to do it multiple times; and then the why, which is the relationship piece, right? I guide you along that process.

I’ve been able to do this with a couple of families who have called in for the 15-minute session. And it’s been super helpful because during a 15-minute session it doesn’t seem like a lot of time; however, one, we’re uber-focused and we’re super focused on asking the right questions. We can actually get a lot covered during that time. And it gives parents this idea of, “Okay, I know the best thing to do at this moment. I know what my child needs at this moment and now I’m receiving all these resources to help me implement this and teach it to my child.”

It’s actually a very fascinating thing to do a 15-minute session with a parent. I was contacted a while ago by a father who wanted to do a 15-minute session and we went through it. We talked about it. He sent a lot of good information about his son who is struggling in school, particularly in school with adults. And so during the process, we went through these elements. Okay, what skills should we be teaching? We went through, how do I teach it? How does the father teach this? Where in our lives am I best going to be able to implement this and my child’s going to implement this? And then, when do we know that he understands, and then the why of the relationship. And by being able to do that, we were able to pinpoint some very specific things that he was going to do.

For example, for that, we used the skill of Effective Communication, to communicate some of his own emotions rather than yelling back at the teacher, okay, and authority figures. We decided to do Effective Communication. The dad was able to watch the video and follow the steps. And then he decided the best time to teach his child, when was the best time, for them would be right before school. And so they did it then, in preparation for the day, and they practiced that until the child was able to do it effectively, on his own without being prompted. And it almost became second nature to him. And of course, he reinforced that with their relationship, saying, “I know you can do it. And we’re doing this, we’re working on this together.” It takes all of the blame and all of the shame out of correcting a behavior and it actually helps parents address behaviors or the behavior, and not blame or shame a child. Super, super great way to get the 15-minutes going when we are communicating is to use this roadmap to guide us along what you need.

Now after that, when you receive the email from me with a list of skills that you can implement and you can try with your child, that is up to you. This is where you have the power to effectuate the change in your own child. You’re going to be able to feel more resourceful and more powerful in your ability to parent your child because you have this additional help.

And that’s actually something that I am passionate about is empowering parents to be able to do these things on their own. I am not a firm believer in coaching someone forever. I feel that people are resourceful enough and they can learn things to be self-sufficient and they can be independent. And that’s my goal for all parents is to be to feel like they are empowered to do what they need to do to help their child be successful.

That actually talks a lot about the coaching, what happens with the coaching session and after all of that. Again, you can contact me by email, set up another time for additional coaching. That’s absolutely fine, and I would love to communicate with you and work with you on very specific issues that you are struggling on with your child.

Now, if you haven’t listened to Episode 41 of the podcast, jump back and listen to it because actually, it gives you more detail into this whole process of coaching, as well as, these elements that we work through in order to help you kind of create a roadmap of how you would approach any type of behavior that you want to correct, right? You can use it in any situation. Any behavior that you see, you can use these elements on your own and you can self-determine what is going to be best for your child. And that actually makes me super happy because I want successful people. I want successful children. I want to see young children feel empowered. And I love to see parents who are happy and able to help their children without damaging their relationship and change behaviors.

That is what coaching in a nutshell is. There are so many nuance pieces in here as well that need to be talked about. And I will talk about them later on, but I did want to point out how it works. You jump over to the website, you put in your information, your name and your email. It will give you a questionnaire that you fill out. That will generate, for me, this notification that you have signed up for a coaching session, a free 15-minute coaching session. I will then look over what you’ve submitted and come up with some ideas before we communicate. I’ll send you an email as a reminder of our appointment. I will then telephone call you. I will call you and we will communicate for the 15-minutes.

Now, I would like to say that 15-minutes is just 15-minutes, but sometimes actually it’s kind of a little over, which is okay with me. That’s fine because I really am here to help and I really, really want to help. Sometimes it’s gone a little bit over that and we’ve been able to work that out and communicate about whatever is needed. And then by the end of the phone call, I will provide you with three or four very specific things that you can do, very specific skills that you can try with your child.

I will then send you an email with a list of those recommendations as well as an overview of our conversation with links to those specific skills. You have everything in that email to do what you need to do. And you can watch the videos of those skills, in addition to printable materials that you can use or games and activities they can use to teach it. And those are all available in the email, and then you’re off deciding how you’re going to approach this and how you’re going to do this. You can also respond to me by email and let me know if you want to continue a coaching session, but that is in a nutshell what the 15-minute free session is all about.

I actually want to invite all parents to contact me and let’s get this going. Let me help you. I am wanting to help. I really want to help all parents as much as possible, which is why this forum is super exciting for me because their reach is huge. There’s a lot of people that I’ll be able to reach in doing this. Go ahead and sign up now. If you go in there and you sign up and you do not see a time slot that is available when you are free, sign up and leave a message in there and I will be sure to see it and see if we can make some accommodations to make it work.

Again, those slots fill up and they fill up pretty quick. So jump in, sign-up. If there is a conflict, just fill it out and put it in the comment section when you’re filling out the questionnaire of possible times as well and we can make that work. Yeah, that’s it for me for now. I felt like it was important to jump back and talk about the free mini-coaching session because it is important. It’s an important part of engaging and interacting with you, answering your questions, and being able to really give you what you need for the situations that you’re facing with your child. That’s it. That’s it for me. I hope you have a great day and I will see you again next time. All right, bye.


Ep #36: Relationships–the why of the Teaching-Family Model

Ep #40: When do I need ADHD Parenting Coaching

Ep #41: How I coach parents of kids with ADHD

Ep #42: What parents need to teach–behavior skills

Ep #43: When–teaching to negative behaviors

Ep #44: Where am I emotionally?

Ep #45: How–quality components of the Teaching-Family Model


Behavior skills of the Teaching-Family Model

Ep #48: What it takes to change behavior

Ep #49: Compound effect of Effective Communication


Free 15-minute ADHD coaching mini-session

Podcast sponsor Utah Youth Village

Support the ADHD Smarter Parenting Podcast. Donate.

Podcast Transcript

The transcript text is below. You can also download the PDF file of the transcript here.